Today is Gary Oldman’s birthday. He turns 56 today. Happy Birthday Lord Gary Oldman.
My name is Wall Grimm and I wrote a birthday tale for Gary Oldman, which is a congruent yet oxymoronically disconnected conundrum describing why I dubbed him a Lord, even though the tale addresses that in no way whatsoever.
WALL GRIMM’S BIRTHDAY TALE OF GARY OLDMAN’S AMAZING JOURNEY
Once upon a time there was a man named Gary who was kind of a punk, but he decided to take up the piano in order to clean himself up. However, his own playing made him start to go deaf, so he left the concert hall to go to a magical school. But he got in trouble and was sent to prison. He eventually escaped from Alcatraz. Make that Azkaban. Disguising himself as a little person, he became involved in the world of street art and the avant garde, but David Bowie…
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